Something to chew on.

Let's take a few steps back and breathe a moment, shall we?

Why do gay members of our society - of the human race at large - desire the term marriage?

This is what I think: It would offer what homosexual couples want: acceptance and respect. Churches, however, do not want to "accept" what they see as sinful behavior, even if they themselves do not have to solemnize it. Others don't want to accept it because, well, it's just "icky."

Seriously now. If it were solely a moral issue, we would then attempt to make it illegal for couples to live together and so on and so forth. If gay marriage is a threat to the family unit, certainly unmarried couples living together is as well. The argument could be made.

Giving homosexual couples the right to the term "marriage" and the benefits thereof would not necessarily equate acceptance, though. That starts with us and ends with the notions that homosexuals aren't a family-kinda-people, that they're selfish sex-machines compelled to screw anything they come in contact with and burden the world with AIDS and the like.

We have to stop the awful way some equate them with pedophiles. We have to stop calling them horrible, degrading names. We have to stop because it says nothing good about us. Because they're people, too.

"Me thinks you doth protest too much," anyone?

We have to understand that our sexuality is so much a part of who we are. It just is, and we're creating more problems than we are solving by our actions today. You attack a person's sexuality, call it an abominable sin, and you're attacking them personally. It would be the same way for heterosexual people.

Maybe it wouldn't be such an issue if we'd quit dwelling on it so much, but those gay members of our society need our love. Not our proclamations of love, but actual love. Not an outpouring, but everyday respect. They need us to not treat them differently. We should strive to understand each other, come to terms with our own phobias and preconceived notions. We need to embrace the fact that gay sex seems icky to the heterosexual crowd - but we need to understand straight sex seems icky to the gay crowd.

Correct me if I'm wrong, here, but we are not bringing more to the fold by screaming and shouting and letting our prejudices get the better of us.

Some homosexuals will testify to changing their orientation. I won't question that, but just because a few are able to do this does not mean the whole lot can.

Can you change your heterosexual desires? Maybe some of you could, but I imagine most wouldn't be able to. Most of us wouldn't want to. It doesn't seem natural.

Well, it doesn't seem natural to them, either.

"They're" just like you and me - in more ways than perhaps most of us know.


Listen, this isn't as simple as so many people want it to be. Lord knows I've tried to make it simple - but we have to start by getting over our issues with the gay community. With our own sexuality. We have to start talking to each other to start understanding one another. We have to.

A compromise won't necessarily placate the masses, but unfortunately this won't either. I'm not saying a "no"or "yes" vote is in order, but I really do hate how it's progressing and wish people would suck it up and be mature about this. We have to own our feelings, beliefs, and be held accountable to our actions and words. We have to consider that even if we don't accept what they do, we ought to respect their freedom to live and pursue happiness as they can.

Lets just remember: gay people have feelings, too. You don't have to tell anyone you're doing this, but be a sport for one second and put yourself in their shoes. Too many tormented souls have resorted to suicide, unable to reconcile their homosexual feelings with a heterosexual, self-righteous society or religion. Too many live in self-loathing. Too many try to fit their square peg in a round hole (forgive a bad analogy) and live unhappily ever after.

And who the hell would want to live like that? I wouldn't.

Now they see a light; society is slowly beginning to accept them. Ellen. Will and Grace. Queer Eye. Domestic Partnerships. San Francisco. Some straight people are okay with them getting married. A law might make it legal. They can live as they feel is right and be happy.

But laws can't change stubborn, prejudiced minds - and that's the problem.

That's where we really need to start. Then again, maybe this is a step to get there.